Friday, February 13, 2009

KISS ( Love Gun)


KISS ( LOVE GUN), 2009

15" x 30", oil on canvas

This painting is available at the Judy Saslow gallery

When I was in third grade there was this kid named Amzi who was this huge Kiss fan . His really "cool" parents had taken him to a KISS concert, and he was member of the KISS ARMY ( according to his notebook ).

I remember he brought all of his KISS albums to class for show-and-tell, and nobody was really into KISS at the time ( the average Georgia third grader, I mean). I also remember that he got into this weirdo-crying-"I HATE ALL of YOU"-fight with the entire class when his albums were not adequately revered by his peers . Now I vividly remember thinking that it was really bizarre that a kid would have this sort of reaction to other kids in the class not liking his KISS albums. I mean, yeah, boys usually are the ones who do all of the crying in grade-school, but this was a stand-out performance.

Okay, cut to 1987 in my P.E. class, and two guys get into an actual physical fight over...Motley Crue. Okay, at the end of the fight ( remember, we're like 16 years old, but this is the emotionally stunted rural south) the "Coach" breaks up the fight.


All male teachers in southern high schools are referred to as "Coach", whether they coach anything, or not.

Okay, Coach Billy Joe Bob Frank breaks up this slapping-scratching-rolling-around-fighty thing, and the one kid breaks down and cries. Yes, he cries, and with all the sadness and angst of a little girl whose pony has died,this kid says,''He said Vince Neil is a queer!".

I must also note that the word queer in this case is spoken in multiple syllables. Its pronounced "kU-wEEEr".

Did you know that I was the only one who actually got sent to the office for this fight. Yeah, I was "sent up" for laughing.

... and maybe for pointing out to the "coach" and the two boys the whole irony of the fact that this kid was fighting for the supposed honor of his boy/man love object ( in this case, Vince Neil of Motley Crue).

Oh, and one other thing ; on the day of this fight ( and this is the best part ), we were learning square dancing in class with 23 boys and 4 girls. Awesome. Pin It Now!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

the big tomato

the big tomato

the big tomato, 2009

24" x 24", oil on canvas

This painting is available at the Judy Saslow gallery

"The Big Tomato" is a Dragnet radio show from 1951 ( Sorry, but I've been listening to these a lot lately while I paint...). In this episode, "the big tomato" is the main supplier for "tea" in the Los Angeles area, and Joe and Ben ( Romero, his partner who, incidentally, nobody can ever pronounce his name). The main guy is smuggling the weed in tomato cans into the country, and it's up to Joe to shut it down.

I've recently been "tooling up" my new website, and revising my "artist's statement" and biography ( I guess that doesn't really change much, but...), and I realized something; some of the information that I had read through various artist's websites is written in the third person. As if some authority had come in and written it on their behalf ( when, in fact, we know that the guy/ gal wrote this thing themselves).

If I write a bunch of slick sounding "art speak" on my behalf ( in the third person) will I elevate my work? Is the artist ever really the qualified person to speak about his/ her work? I realize that it's sort of a "launching point" for people to see where the artist is coming from, but seriously, some of these "statements" come off maybe a little...hmmm... pretentious.

This is my new artist statement ( for today ):

Nature aesthetic feelings words oppression government bad people mean words global warming words economy little puppies babies racism mutually assured self destruction more words visa mastercard check or cash.

Good, huh?

Ah, forget that one. This one's better.

My new artist statement ( for tomorrow, but not the day after):

My artwork can cure cancer, so... buy some and you won't "catch" it.


Otto Pin It Now!

Monday, February 09, 2009



songbirds, 2009

30" x 40" , oil on canvas

available at the Judy Saslow gallery

Over the last couple of months I've finished A LOT of paintings. I have to say this period was made more difficult due to the onset of epilepsy by my little dog named "Peanut" ( which has been spelled wonderfully by my niece as "Peenut"). Just when I would really get into something ( because its ALWAYS when you least expect it), my little pal would turn into a canine tsunami. All of my redneck acquaintances told me they would "put her down". This, incidentally, is why I continually make fun of them ( seriously, if anyone is sucking up too much of my oxygen its...). I just look at it as another facet of her personality. The shaking-all-over-and-knocking-over-expensive-lamps-side of her personality.

Okay, I have to share ( which in most cases I'm the last one to hear about these things ) something cool that has totally enhanced my painting environment. This would be the inclusion of Joe Friday's lectures on the evils of "tea". Check it out:

The moral of this story is that if you smoke pot, your children will die. Thanks, Joe.

Either way, these episodes of Dragnet '68, '69, and '70 will probably not be available on DVD, and you can watch them ALL on HULU.

Free ( previously unavailable ) Dragnet episodes. My doggy has epilepsy.

The "Lawd" giveth, and the "Lawd" taketh away. Pin It Now!